I think of you.
I am standing in my bedroom, my sanctuary, alone. I support my fragile frame against the door.
You are not here.
You never will be, again.
A feeling encloses me.
From the back of my thin head, water rushes, crashing and brushing against each hair.
It encircles,
my head,
my mind,
my thoughts.
I am paralysed sitting on the side of my bed.
This blinding pain swallows me from my core.
It heaves and shakes in my heart.
My soul collapses from the pressure.
A tremble of my eyelids, and shut. Whatever troubles the world has to offer me I cannot bear.
An impression of your face in my mind causes my center to swell, then flood.
Each tear, a membrane for an emotion.
I grab my pillow to hold and to love, treating it as if I were you. Squeeze my hand to remember the touch. Cringe in pain at how much your departure has ruined me.
I love you, I miss you, I need you.
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